Applying to be on Intervention to afford rehab + REHAB FOR MARRIED COUPLES

[gnossos (OP)]

I've been wanting to go to rehab longer than I can remember. Ever since I realized that having a kid wasn't gonna be the thing that would magically take away my addictions (one abortion and a miscarriage later), I feel like at least detoxing in a controlled environment is the only chance I've got to be free of the urge to alter my reality as much as possible every waking moment of my life.

I always told myself that rehab is only for rich people and I'd never be able to afford it, but it still didn't stop me from trying. I looked for places that offer scholarships and even went so far as to apply for TV shows that send people to rehab like Intervention and Dr. Phil. (Someone from Dr. Phil actually contacted me about being on the show but I decided against parading my fucked up family on national TV).

Now that I'm married and my husband has an awesome job as a software engineer working from home, I've finally got insurance that would probably cover rehab. The problem is that in order to keep the insurance, my husband has to keep his job. His job is extremely high-pressure/fast paced, he can't afford to miss a few days let alone a few weeks/months for in-patient treatment. We're worried that if we go to rehab, he'll lose his job and the insurance and we'll wind up going home with nothing.

The other issue is that 99% of rehabs seem focused on splitting up couples who use together. Rehabs also have a reputation for hook-ups. My husband has a fear that rehab would tear us apart, that we'd come out of treatment brainwashed into thinking that we can't be together. I have seen Intervention episodes where the rehabs seem to demonize the people they were doing drugs with, and it does seem like every couple that goes winds up split up in the end.

I'm currently looking into Pacific Ocean Rehab in Southern Cali because they say they allow married couples to share a room. Does anyone here know of any other rehabs that allow this? I always thought it'd be a good excuse to travel someplace I've always wanted to go, so I think this would be perfect if my insurance covers it.
 

[Lolleedee]

Hey there!  I'm sorry to hear that you guys are struggling!  It sucks when the addiction cycle spins out of control and you feel like there is no way out.

I have been very lucky to have been able to afford rehab multiple times, however, I have found it to be the biggest waste of money ever.

Everything that is offered in rehab can be done outpatient, except, perhaps the detox.  There are places that will do a bupe or methadone taper outpatient, but if you want a medical detox than perhaps a seven day detox would be a good idea.

Most rehabs are glorified 12 step programs.  Most do not even offer any Cognitive behavioral therapy.  They usually throw you into groups run by people who may or may not have any degree in anything.  Some offer great ammenities like yoga, equine therapy etc. but all this crap you can get on a great vacation....it has little to do with getting or staying clean.

The thing about rehab is you are put in a little bubble that is not anything like real life and in 30 days you are dumped back in the very environment you used in.

This is only my opinion and I hope others will weigh in, but I never met anyone who rehab was ever helpful for.

If you have insurance, then you can access therapy, which is where all the changes will take place anyway, and you can do it while still working.

Are you guys willing to try MAT?  Methadone or Bupe can bring the much needed physical stability so you can get what you need out of counseling.  As a married couple (of which I am a part of too:) ), you not only need couples therapy, but individual.  They are both important.  You can also do the NA/AA thing or a non 12 step alternative such as SMART recovery, SOS, Lifering etc.

I think your money would be better spent on a kick ass vacation after you get some stability under your belt.  The US rehab industry prays on desperate addicts, charging them, and their insurance, thousands of dollars for services you can most certainly access from home.

I understand the urge to "check out of life" for 30 or 60 days, but reality comes slamming back down after discharge and you will be dumped back into life with all the same stressors and triggers.  The only thing the stay will provide is a lower tolerance...hence why people overdose after rehab.

Again, these are just my personal observations over my past 20 years of using.  I finally found my way with methadone and counseling...was never able to do it with 12 steps, rehab or anything else.  I wish I had all the thousands upon thousands of dollars I spent looking for a way out...I'd be on a whirlwind world tour right now!!!

Good luck with whatever you choose! Addiction sucks!

[OpiXPO]

Most rehabs are glorified 12 step programs.  Most do not even offer any Cognitive behavioral therapy.  They usually throw you into groups run by people who may or may not have any degree in anything.  Some offer great ammenities like yoga, equine therapy etc. but all this crap you can get on a great vacation....it has little to do with getting or staying clean.

Nail on the head here. Outside of detox, in patient rehab is just vacation, and not your only option. As said above, you have MAT, out-patient rehab, 12 step meetings, one on one therapy, ect.

Also, the reason couples typically don't work out is because one is dedicated and the other is just along for the ride. If your both dedicated to make it with or without each other, then you'll probably make it with each other.  You guys do need to be ready to give each other space though, who you are is going to change often and quick.