Replacement therapy

[mickeyaye6989 (OP)]

Anyone else find they only drink excessively when they're trying to cut back on other shit? I never had a problem with alcohol when I'm set with H and coke (maybe like 3-5 drinks/week MAX, if any at all) but when I'm cutting back or going cold turkey, I drink like a goddamn fish out of water. I basically go straight from drinking nothing, to drinking a liter of vodka per day.\

During my 2 year period of abstinence from opiates, I spent the first year drinking a 6-pack/day, but moved up to a handle every 2-3 days, which I maintained for a solid year and a half. Eventually I started to get back soreness and pains when bending over or turning certain ways, which I believe was my liver telling me to chill the fuck out. Went back to heroin as a way to quell my demons with the drink, and while my liver certainly benefitted, my overall well being did not as I caught a nasty habit.

I always think back to Burroughs who used to talk extensively about how opiates were the perfect drug because even if you do them to the fucking MAX ALL DAY ERRRRDAY, they won't actually affect your long term health (disregarding withdrawls and OD's, that is) really at all. Ever hear about a long term heroin junkie dying from liver disease? Nope... (unless they were also an alcoholic or had HCV)!

Sometimes I feel like maintaining a dope habit is safer than drinking as it won't scar my organs, but the sheer cost of a nice heroin habit makes it unsustainable and unrealistic. I know that many of us who suffer from addiction seem to put ourselves fully and completely into everything we do, and we never do anything half way (including getting fucking lit!!!) so drinking a little is often not an option, but I often wonder if, in a perfect world, would I not be completely satisfied and happy if I had a steady supply of H to shoot 4x/day? Maybe I should move to Amsterdam and start my career as a heroin-mantiennce candidate. Qualifications: massive dope habit, multiple relapses, inability to stay in rehab or maintain sobriety.

[Chip]

It's something we here all share - the compulsion to consume or ingest something, sometimes anything.

Sounds totally normal to me.

But I'm scared of alcohol and you are going to be healthier on the gear.

Maybe not as comfortable but better off.

Canada are introducing a Heroin maintenence program (I think) so there's hope yet.

[mickeyaye6989 (OP)]

Yeah, I think one of the things I often struggle with is the harsh social attitude toward heroin vs the almost encouraging/reinforcing attitude that society has toward alcohol. I tell myself that I need to get clean, but I just don't fucking want to yet. I may hate the fact that I depend on something, but god damn I still love heroin and the lifestyle that goes with it. When I'm shooting dope, I actually get out and go do stuff with people, whereas when I drink, I often do it alone at home and to the point where I get nasty hangovers or back pain (hoping its not my liver flaring up to remind me to tone it down). It may not be the perfect life, but hell, at least I won't die at 48 from liver failure.

That's good to hear about Canada and heroin maintenance therapy - I feel like the whole drug treatment system needs to be revamped. I mean, think about this: codeine is OTC is Canada. If we replaced the usual short term methadone/suboxone detox with a morphine/codeine, it would make things so much easier for those trying to actually kick the habit, and those that don't want to would be foiled by the ceiling dose of codeine. Start tapering with morph, and switch to codeine when you're low enough, which is how I got clean the first time. By no means a walk in the park, but I can't imagine enduring 2 months of 'done WD's and actually sticking through it.

Moreover, I actually went to the local rehab/detox clinic and explained my habit to the doc (that I had been on a nice H binge, but was tapering with morph and planning to move to codeine soon before jumping off completely) and he still insisted that I get on subs as they would be easier to quit than my codeine taper. I relayed this info to my psychologist and she agreed that their approach was fucked, as I clearly stated multiple times that "I don't want to go from a weaker drug to a stronger one" but she said that these docs often tell the patients that going on subs will make things easier, even if they're only on like 80mg of oxy/day. That's a fucking weak ass habit compared to being on 8mg of bupe/day, and the fact that THEIR DRUGS are ok but my weaker drugs aren't shows that it's all a fucking racket.

Just seeing the hippocracy within the drug rehabilitation medical community makes me feel like I'm not so bass-ackwards in thinking that society has it wrong on the concept of which drugs should be socially acceptable. Can anyone else envision a reality where shooting dope is the cool thing to do, and instead of tricked out vape-pens and expensive bongs, we have gold plated syringes with diamonds and shit on em, and the convo down at the local spot is on which stamp is the best instead of which craft beer is the most obscure and indie? Sounds like a heaven I could float in for eternity.

I just wanna have my cake and eat it too...

[George]

Yeah, I feel you. Sometimes, circumstances warrant going into the alcohol realm, but I'd avoid it, yet I don't  Look into Poppy Seed Tea (PST), my friend.

Of course weed too, however, it might not satisfy that addictive hunger, but still, it helps and is virtually harmless... so do it (I predict it will be legal nationwide by 2020) 

There's no general rule with alcohol... Just try not to fuck up too much, I guess hahahaha 


-dRuNk pOsT

[MoeMentim]

Same deal here - on h I have no interest in alcohol whatsoever, like maybe the occasional single beer with a meal but even that's a rarity.  Off the h I drink more or less every day.  This go-around hasn't been too severe, usually a a six pack a night, on weekends I'll throw a little whiskey on it. like 2 shooters at most. I fucking hate it though, makes me stupid & even though it's definitely cheaper than an h habit but I feel like it's a bigger waste of money. 

  So long as the political/social situation remains the same I hope never to have another opi habit.  I can't keep up with the expense - I have no real hustle, I'm just a working stiff.  If it were legal I'd be in day one, if there was a path to legal full agonist maintenance I'd work up a new habit & put my life back in a hole just to qualify.

[Chip]

I don't mind the odd drink now but I prefer Phenibut and GHB/GBL and the odd benzo, sometimes all 3 but in moderation.

[DreamerOnTheRun]

I can't fucking STAND alcohol if I've been using opiates, especially if I did just earlier that day.  I puke everytime, not because I'm so fucked up, it just wrecks my stomach.  Plus (I'm not sure if it's my GABA receptors) I have to drink so much to catch a buzz, just like benzos.  I can swallow a fist full of benzos, drinking is an unpleasant task 99% of the time.  The exception being something tasty like a good dark beer or someshit.

One interesting explanation I've heard is that it's a leftover instinctual mechanism used for when we ate/drank random shit the stuff bad for you would taste like shit to deter you from eating it.  So it's like your body saying "danger-danger".  This intrigued me because of the fact that when I'm on opiates I (and many others) swear it tastes 1,000x worse than it does when you're not.