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Core Topics => Health Issues and Medical => Topic started by: The Ryan on September 27, 2015, 12:58:44 AM

Title: My body is finally fighting back. - urgent
Post by: The Ryan on September 27, 2015, 12:58:44 AM
Some of you may recognize me for those who don't I will post an intro eventually but I'm on the phone and this is urgent.

So I've been on quite the bender lately, shooting meth daily and meth/heroin speedballs very often for about a month. I tried meth for the first time a month ago and have only missed 1 full day since, which is where this story starts.

Well it really starts about a week ago. I do a large meth injection and my arm goes numb and tingly, muscles spazzing really bad on the arm I injecting into. This starts happening every injection, but of course I ignore it cuz I wanna get high. I start trying different veins, same result, the limb I shoot in goes numb, regardless of the substance. Even subutex alone, which I've been shooting daily over 6 years now, causes this, both arms, both legs, numb and tingly after injection. I try my jugular and voila, no ill effects. Great right? No.

3 days ago I decide I need a break from meth and heroin, no noticeable WD symptoms except the occasional brain zap. I do a shot of subutex in my jugular and nothing bad happens, until a few hours later. I'm out running errands and I get an intense sense of vertigo and dizziness. I figure it's dehydration. So I stop at a fast good restaurant and get 2 large powerade. Suck one down, now it gets scary. I get an insanely noticeable metallic taste in my mouth, start sweating profusely, heart beating harder and faster than it ever has, left side of body goes numb and tingly.  and I had done no meth that day, mind you.

I think I'm dying, I'm texting friends with the address I'm at telling them to send 911 if they don't hear from me in 30 minutes. I was scared as shit. Symptoms subside after about an hour, I drive to the hospital and sit in the parking lot, nothing crazy so I call out of work, go home and take some Benzos and lay down. Nothing else really happens that night, I don't inject anything else, start snorting my subs.

I wake up yesterday. Debilitating brain zaps every 2-10 seconds. I decide to cop some meth and smoke it, instead of IV it, as I'm scared shitless of using anything IV at this point. I smoke the meth and the brain zaps go away, I go to work and nothing bad happens.

Wake up today very dizzy and with minor brain zaps, take a few hits of meth. All is well.

So now it's been about 3 days since I've used any substance IV. I'm scared shitless to do so again I've been sniffing my subs, eating my Benzos, smoking my meth.

What the fuck would cause my limb to go numb regardless of the substance injected, I know I'm not missing. More important, what happened the other day? Minor stroke? Minor heart attack? Panic attack? I honestly thought I was dying. It was the scariest thing I've ever been through in my entire life.

I can't be hooked on meth (money, health, etc.) I have 3 days in a row off this week so I'm gonna see if I can stop. The second day of no meth was just, horrid, brain zaps every 2-10 seconds, they were completely debilitating, but I could not call out of work again.

So what are these brain zaps?

Title: Re: My body is finally fighting back. - urgent
Post by: Opus on September 27, 2015, 01:31:39 AM
They could be small seizures. I get them in wd (ever since taking zoloft years ago) from many different drugs, but for me they're only annoying and they usually don't hang around long, they're not debilitating (i'm talking specifically about "brain zaps").

I had something like a phenibut overdose a few years ago and experienced like a time-skipping experience, I called them "brain skips" at the time I later learned that they were probably petit mal seizures.

You're toeing a line Ryan. You should find some help soon, IMO you probably need medical attention. Lots of minor wds can cause this, but IME it's never been anywhere near debilitating..

Title: Re: My body is finally fighting back. - urgent
Post by: St. Theresa on September 27, 2015, 01:49:33 AM
Hey ry...this sounds bad, I hope you're serious about cutting this shit out of your life. Doesn't seem like fun,

I wish I could answer your questions, what you're experiencing sounds terrifying ... and if I were you I'd really do see a doctor, but I know you don't want to that, doesn't sound like you're in the best shape man. I worry about you.
Title: Re: My body is finally fighting back. - urgent
Post by: Zoops on September 27, 2015, 02:04:16 AM
OMFG that sounds terrible, Ryan. Please just cut the meth out. You have benzos and subs, so it shouldn't be too much of a problem after you get about 20 hours of deep, restful sleep (in a row, that is).

I have been smoking crack and sniffing some dope for the comedown like once a week for the past couple months. The most recent time I got some money together (about 200-some dollars), which was last Thursday (two days ago), I didn't immediately run and get some. I really don't miss it, as long as I have some seeds, which I do. Working on the second quart of a 3 quart dose of PST as I write this.

I hear the high from smoking coke is similar to that of meth, but it's so very short lived, it's a different animal entirely.

I feel sad now. :(

Oh yeah I was going to say something about brain zaps. Are you familiar with SSRI W/D symptoms, Ryan?

Is that what you're describing, because that could be some sort of serotonin-like reaction from the meth. Makes sense to me. High doses of and prolonged use of meth can cause serotonin depletion, similar to the SSRI withdrawal syndrome. I know meth can fuck with 5HT for sure, and the use pattern you're describing leaves nothing to be imagined that this is occurring in you.

Oh and yeah, +1 on the whole going through Zoloft w/d, then getting brain zaps from other types of w/d too, specifically in my experience I got them when coming off EtOH whereas I had never had that happen before. I think SSRI's prime the brain in some way, and create permanent changes.

My mom's brain probably looks like Swiss cheese, because she's been on Prozac since the shit came out waaaaay back in 1988! (at least I think it was '88, but it was right when it was brand-spanking new on the market - she'd tried all the tricyclics, and maprotiline too, which is technically a tetra-cyclic but related chemically to the tricyclics, and also Trazodone, and Wellbutrin but finally got some relief from Prozac. Yes, it does help some people).
Title: Re: My body is finally fighting back. - urgent
Post by: nick on September 27, 2015, 02:34:59 AM
I really advise you to find some professional medical help asap-rather than asking a bunch of well intentioned dopers on the web.

Seriously,medical help NOW.

Take care of yourself,man.
Title: Re: My body is finally fighting back. - urgent
Post by: The Ryan on September 27, 2015, 02:41:50 AM
I'm honestly more worried about the heart attack/left side of body numb/metallic taste in mouth episode.

The brain zaps seen to be common in stopping drugs that boost serotonin.
Title: Re: My body is finally fighting back. - urgent
Post by: The Ryan on September 27, 2015, 02:43:03 AM
I really advise you to find some professional medical help asap-rather than asking a bunch of well intentioned dopers on the web.

Seriously,medical help NOW.

Take care of yourself,man.

ER will chalk it up to drugs give me an IV for a few hours and let me loose with a 5000 bill.
Title: Re: My body is finally fighting back. - urgent
Post by: St. Theresa on September 27, 2015, 02:47:25 AM
I really advise you to find some professional medical help asap-rather than asking a bunch of well intentioned dopers on the web.

Seriously,medical help NOW.

Take care of yourself,man.

Yes^^^this please ry


I left you a private message. :)
Title: Re: My body is finally fighting back. - urgent
Post by: Jega on September 27, 2015, 03:18:33 AM
Do you have a primary care physician? I ask because the er would need to know if you have a dr for medication management afterwards,

No bullshit *spins chair around* You need a dr. and a diagnosis.
Title: Re: My body is finally fighting back. - urgent
Post by: Tony on September 27, 2015, 03:56:21 AM
Brother Ryan,

Sometimes you got to hear the warning from life, God, your body, old friends... Please man, I been there with shooting those speedballs....

Drop the Meth and get checked out at the ER.. None of us can diagnose you man.. Too damn much is my guess.

We love you man. You are too damn young to die. Get help and have someone update us... Please...

Tony         
Title: Re: My body is finally fighting back. - urgent
Post by: sk8phaze on September 27, 2015, 04:00:04 AM
Be safe Ryan, if u have the insurance or cash to see a doctor do it.
Title: Re: My body is finally fighting back. - urgent
Post by: Sand and Water on September 27, 2015, 04:24:33 AM
Yes, please please listen to the advice about getting seen NOW.  Your symptoms (odd taste & one side of your body going numb) are really worrisome. When you add unusual elevated heart rate & rhythm, it's not something that should be dismissed by an ER.

Chest pain. & these symptoms could be a result  of anything from a clot to a stroke , MI etc. Explain your symptoms and don't leave until they run labs & tests.  I know it's really expensive, but there's no replacing YOU. If you can, please keep us posted ok?
Title: Re: My body is finally fighting back. - urgent
Post by: Morfy on September 27, 2015, 05:19:58 AM
like others have said: go get checked out.

possibly, a severe infection from IVing dirty shit.  mi and cva (stroke) could be causing it as well.

doctors have the tests & diagnostic equipment & treatment to help you.
Title: Re: My body is finally fighting back. - urgent
Post by: Chip on September 27, 2015, 07:04:43 AM
yes, please get professional medical help now.

this is an order !

using meth never did that to me but I did lose some smell/taste perception whilst using heavily and it hasn't got better despite being far more careful.

I am concerned for you.
Title: Re: My body is finally fighting back. - urgent
Post by: sk8phaze on September 27, 2015, 08:46:03 AM
This is what harm reduction is all about, get a ct scan or an ekg or whatever you have to do, we've all lost way to many good people and we don't want you to be the next one. Please be safe and take care.
Title: Re: My body is finally fighting back. - urgent
Post by: Daughter of Dionysus on September 27, 2015, 09:04:46 AM
Wow Ryan
I'm REALLY worried about you

If you want to continue your current drug regime
Please do so without the needles

We never interacted on the phile
But I remember you

Glad you made it here

Stay safe

Sorry I have no helpful advice
Title: Re: My body is finally fighting back. - urgent
Post by: Anti-hero on September 27, 2015, 09:14:57 AM
Ryan
you know you can go to the hospital and give a fake name to at least get a idea abot the numbness it could be your brain giving you a mini stroke when you I.V or a sign that one more shot could trigger a full stroke
Please Take care of your self I am glad you found your way here
Title: Re: My body is finally fighting back. - urgent
Post by: The Ryan on September 27, 2015, 10:32:58 AM
Hospital ain't happening, it just isn't, not unless something like the other day happens again.

Yea yea, I know next time could be the last time, but I'm not using needles again, at least for a very long time.

People have put up with a lot more than one month of meth abuse and lived to tell the tale. Right now I'm only taking a puff of meth when the brain zaps start, I got more benzos today so hopefully those will help the zaps and I won't have to use much meth. 4 days ago if I had a gram of meth it woulda all up my veins in 12 hours. This gram I got over 24 hours ago I still have over .75 left.

Only way I'm seeing a doc is if I have an experience like the other day again. I really should/want to go to the ER but As soon as they see Amps and Benzos and god know what else in my system they will flag and discharge me and tell me to stop taking amps.

The only thing that bothers me is my mom died a couple years ago out of nowhere  from some genetic heart disorder where she was missing some valve or some shit like that. my sister was able to grab a ultrasound to see if she had it and she was in the clear but I was never able to get one before insurance cut out. If I ever feel like that again I will call 911. Till then I can't put all this out in the open.

I got a few days off this week so I may try the fake name thing, but the incident was days ago now. So idk what they could really do.

I'm typically pretty resilient to this shit but I do not have a ton of experience with amps, before the meth it was a month long IV cocaine binge, not the first coke binge either, and I've shot my fair share of other various uppers, just never meth. I think it was just a panic attack, I had no Benzos on me at the time, was accross town, and the lightheaded feeling just triggered something.

I'll keep y'all posted, glad I found this spot. Knew you fuckers were lurking about somewhere, dunno what happened over on the Phile but I'm glad something is available. I'll be around.
Title: Re: My body is finally fighting back. - urgent
Post by: Opus on September 28, 2015, 07:37:15 AM
Don't kid yourself man, perfectly healthy people DO drop from tweak, just like with coke.

I get it, I've been there with that shit - when I first discovered speed I thought it was the greatest fucking thing EVER. I probably would have gone even harder on the shit if people were smoking it back then.

Just don't think bad things don't happen to people who "appear" healthy, cos they do happen, you just don't hear about it much..

Be safe yo, sounds to me like your body is telling you something..

/my $.02
Title: Re: My body is finally fighting back. - urgent
Post by: Chip on September 28, 2015, 03:41:26 PM
and injecting just opens your body right up as you bypass the normal filters.

every shot carries risk. be sterile, smart and tidy.

I'd lob onto ER without fail and admit nothing, but get it seen to. please. get help.
Title: Re: My body is finally fighting back. - urgent
Post by: The Ryan on October 03, 2015, 04:12:34 PM
Pretty much just typing this cuz I need to talk to someone and everyone I know is asleep, and a quick update on my situation.

I am still using meth daily, smoking it. I have cut back A LOT. I am doing now in a day what I was doing in two hours, prolly about 4-7 half a point bowls a day, I did slip up and do one shot but only once. I'm pretty happy about that, I don't even smoke weed anymore, just my bupe and benzos as always.

Work is going great, life seems pretty ok other than the meth. I feel like if I could stop using tina I would almost be like a normal person. I am even gaining back some of the weight I lost in my first couple weeks of usage, I've always been skinny as a stick, I'm 6'2" and the most I have ever weighed is 135, I got down to 116 at the worst, and I just weighed in at 121!

I am however an emotional wreck on the inside despite my outside happy demeanor, I just realized I still love my ex, like, so, fucking, much. I miss having someone to talk to. I hang out with people, but I'd never talk to them if we didn't get high together.

This all started when a mutual friend of ours told me that she admitted to him that she still loves me. Before that, I rarely thought of her, I was too busy hanging out with massive doses of meth, I thought I had moved on.

But I miss her so much, her smell, her laugh, her craziness, her needy bullshit, all of it. She was the only person I've ever loved, ever. I have to see her almost every day at work, and see her get hurt by other guys who don't give give a shit about any part of her but her vagina.

We haven't even spoken since we broke up except like, necessities at work, and even then it's one word and mostly she gets other people to speak to me for her, it's killing me. I want to talk to her so bad but she's always with these fucking idiot people I work with who are just the run-of-mill, gossip hungry, partying, think they are god's gift to earth, fucks.

Which makes me even more mad because when we were together we rarely got to hang out between work, her kids, her parents not wanting her to be with someone because she had just called off a marriage, point is, we didn't see each other much, but she makes time for these fucking bitches who don't give a damn about her and these guys who just want to stick their fucking dick in her. I was working almost twice as many hours when we were together because work was short staffed but still.

I want to knock some sense into her (not literally, just make her understand). Tell her these guys will not fill whatever void it is she is trying to fill, tell her she doesn't need these people, that she has someone who would do anything for her.

More importantly, I'd like her to knock some sense into me, the only time in the past 8 years I have not gotten high every single day was when I was with her, I still took my bupe and benzos but that goes without saying, and neither even come close to getting me high. I need her to fucking tell me to grow a pair of balls and get off the fucking meth. I need to cry on her shoulder and explain how I've been slowly (maybe not as slow as I think) killing myself with speedballs, IV crack, and methamphetamine since we broke up. But I don't know if she would understand, she probably thinks "why did I ever date some sick, disgusting 120 pound tweaker junkie loser.

She is doing almost the same shit though, she needs to constantlyl be in a (new, honeymoon phase) relationship in order to mask her feelings, I need to constantly be high on hard drugs to mask mine.

Fucking mess right? Sorry for the book, I'm not as depressed as this post makes me sound, but I do love that girl more than anything in this whole wide world, and it fucking kills me knowing she cried over a fucking piece of shit who didn't even care about her.

Ugh, I have to stop.

Goodnight, I broke my fucking pipe tonight, moved with it in my hand and it smacked against something and the bowl part shattered, so pissed, so I'm gonna go by a new one tomorrow.

So at least I have a nice clean, shiny, new meth pipe to look forward to, eh?
Title: Re: My body is finally fighting back. - urgent
Post by: Sand and Water on October 03, 2015, 09:03:43 PM
Hey Ryan--going to send you an email in a bit, but hope you're getting some sleep right now.  In the meantime, please stop calling yourself a loser & all the other stuff, k? 

You have deep feelings for someone who seems to have her own "stuff", - it sucks, but doesn't mean YOU suck too k?  Hang in there, I remember how much you helped me by generously sharing info & your time on the other site. You're anything *but* some "lowlife loser"!
Title: Re: My body is finally fighting back. - urgent
Post by: Z on October 03, 2015, 09:08:51 PM
Why buy a new one?  Seems like a good excuse to put down the pipe to me.

Not forever, but take a 3 day break and see what happens.  Maybe you will feel better.  If not, you can always buy a new pipe then.
Title: Re: My body is finally fighting back. - urgent
Post by: nick on October 03, 2015, 11:36:38 PM
Ryan bro,with respect,you need to be telling her all that not us.

Luck with it.
Title: Re: My body is finally fighting back. - urgent
Post by: The Ryan on October 04, 2015, 02:22:15 AM
Ryan bro,with respect,you need to be telling her all that not us.

Luck with it.

Don't know if I could do it. Definitely not at work.

Don't even like to think about that convo.

And z, close to a quarter in my pocket so that's not gonna happen lol
Title: Re: My body is finally fighting back. - urgent
Post by: Chip on October 06, 2015, 03:20:21 AM
I'm on pipe #6 :(
Title: Re: My body is finally fighting back. - urgent
Post by: The Ryan on October 06, 2015, 03:39:59 AM
I'm on pipe #6 :(

Yea I bought 2 the other day, already broke one of them. Lol. It was hell trying to find a store that had them but I ended up finding them at a head shop only 5 minutes down the road, they don't have em on display you have to actually ask for them, they are behind the counter.

I need a torch also, or refillable lighter at least. I literally am going through a Bic lighter almost every day, so annoying, that shit adds up. The torches melt your dope so quick though you gotta be careful not to burn your shit, definitely would not recommend a torch to someone till they figured out how the stuff burns and how to treat it.

The little round candles work well when at home and save a lot of fuel.
Title: Re: My body is finally fighting back. - urgent
Post by: Chip on October 06, 2015, 03:55:33 AM
I use a gas stove lighter and aim for vapeing at sub-burn temps, rocking the pipe too, it's tricky and beats injecting, so there are some benefits.

just by using only once per week for the most part, I then live an otherwise normal life; that's my optimal frequency.

what it is, it's a bit of crystal "chipping", by another name  ::) 8) :)

crystal chip. says "slow down, bro'"
Title: Re: My body is finally fighting back. - urgent
Post by: Jega on October 06, 2015, 04:44:35 AM
I use a gas stove lighter and aim for vapeing at sub-burn temps, rocking the pipe too, it's tricky and beats injecting, so there are some benefits.

just by using only once per week for the most part, I then live an otherwise normal life; that's my optimal frequency.

what it is, it's a bit of crystal "chipping", by another name  ::) 8) :)

crystal chip. says "slow down, bro'"
If you're only using once a week keep it up! There are a lot of people on Meth that would kill for that self control!
Title: Re: My body is finally fighting back. - urgent
Post by: Zoops on October 06, 2015, 04:56:14 AM
Me, ME? Well, I just finished off the second of two 24oz steel Reserve 211's (8.1% alc/vol beer for you non-us type people), and that's after drinking up 3lb worth of PST, with a second wash, giving a total volume of 3qts. (0.75gal).

THEN, I made a Kraft Mac-n-Cheese dinner, added in a can of tuna fish, and ate that fucker right up. Thinkin of going down to the 7-11 now to bum a couple smokes and maybe buy a beer...

Can't wait till Thursday when I next get $$.

- Zoops out.
Title: Re: My body is finally fighting back. - urgent
Post by: Chip on October 06, 2015, 05:04:41 AM
I use a gas stove lighter and aim for vapeing at sub-burn temps, rocking the pipe too, it's tricky and beats injecting, so there are some benefits.

just by using only once per week for the most part, I then live an otherwise normal life; that's my optimal frequency.

what it is, it's a bit of crystal "chipping", by another name  ::) 8) :)

crystal chip. says "slow down, bro'"
If you're only using once a week keep it up! There are a lot of people on Meth that would kill for that self control!

i wish it were all by choice as i am unemployed ... but it works. i'll take that as a compliment.
Title: Re: My body is finally fighting back. - urgent
Post by: The Ryan on October 06, 2015, 03:41:50 PM
I use a gas stove lighter and aim for vapeing at sub-burn temps, rocking the pipe too, it's tricky and beats injecting, so there are some benefits.

just by using only once per week for the most part, I then live an otherwise normal life; that's my optimal frequency.

what it is, it's a bit of crystal "chipping", by another name  ::) 8) :)

crystal chip. says "slow down, bro'"

It's a little better than the IV crack binge I was on for about a month before the crystal, had to carry around vinegar 24/7, I spilled a bottle in my car and it stunk like vinegar for like a week, super embarrassing. Plus in the bathroom every 10 minutes. Fucking coke, ugh.

Wish I had that money back..

But yea, I feel horrendous without crystal, the heart attack scare that prompted the creation of this thread was my only day without dosing, was gonna try to take a break, and before morning dose I'm very dizzy, vision is blurry, etc. If it's gonna be like that panic attack, think i'm going to die, vertigo, dizzy, crap feeling any time I try to quit, I dunno if I will be able to stop.

self control just isn't my forte with stims lately, which is strange because I have excellent self control with benzos. Maybe knowing I will start flopping like a fish if I go without helps, and bupe, well that doesn't require much willpower to have self control with.

Pretty sure everyone thinks I'm gay also, since in this scene it's a lot of gays. So me in my room, up all night with 3 absolute flaming homosexuals, looks normal, right? Turning me out is gonna be a bigger challenge than they think though, bring a few ounces over and we can talk.  ;)
Title: Re: My body is finally fighting back. - urgent
Post by: Daughter of Dionysus on October 18, 2015, 07:42:01 AM
Ryan
Sometimes when I was crashing
I would just eat up straight pusdo
It helps with the crash. I hope you v Sr vokg
Title: Re: My body is finally fighting back. - urgent
Post by: Chip on October 20, 2015, 08:41:48 AM
how's your health, Ryan ?

i hope you have some days of regenerative sleep under your belt.
Title: Re: My body is finally fighting back. - urgent
Post by: The Ryan on November 20, 2015, 12:01:02 AM
Just a little update on this situation.
It's over, very, very soon.

The scene is hot, almost positive some people are going to start getting handcuffs for the holidays, the dope costs twice as much, and the money is tapped in every way.

It's amazing how quick life can flip-flop, 4 months ago I had a plush bank account, and a relatively under control life, for an addict of my caliber.

Now I'm back to being broke as fuck, scraping by, hard drugs daily all day, every day. Christ..

Anyway, have used meth every day since that original post. Lord have mercy...

But, unless I start robbing liquor stores or selling my ass (I am a terrible robber and have no ass) then yea, the jig is up.
 
I am still getting these brain zaps unless I'm dosed up nice and proper. They suck, but I think I can manage them for a little while. Work is going to be really, really hard without amphetamines. The "slowness" and lethargy are really going to kick my ass, I can barely walk down the stairs in the morning without being out of breath unless I do some. I really wish I could get into see a doctor and get some aderall, I was on them for years. Keeping opiates and benzos in my system is my main concern for now though, I'll deal without the Tina, won't be fun, or pretty, but I'll deal.

I've known it's been coming for a while so I have been doing like 100mg,   2 maybe 3 times a day instead of quarter gram shots every couple hours.

I think I'm gonna grab a little clonazolam and some G and fucking sleep for a week. I hope it works out.  I have a few days left and think I'm going to buy another half g and try to further reduce this dosage. but kicking this stuff is immenent.

I'm not saying I'll never do it again, but in this crowd, with these prices, not like I have been doing it, it's just not possible.

I'll keep you guys updated. Time to do my night cap and stop these brain zap fucking things.

What I will miss most, sitting cracking out for 12+ hours straight fucking around with the linux terminal and writing python scripts, fuck, I really hope I still enjoy doing that after all this lol, starting to get pretty good. I met a kid a while are back who created his own 3D printer too, no fucking joke. Say some shit about ttweakers, but they sure can dedicate themselves to a project, hell, usually 17 at a time.

peace.
Title: Re: My body is finally fighting back. - urgent
Post by: Chip on November 20, 2015, 03:19:46 AM
HUGE RULE - NEVER use daily.
* i call twice a week even problematic.

time to regenerate neurotransmitters ... it will take at least 6 weeks.

i'm sure you're  well over-it, anyway ... you must stop, rest, recover, rebuild life etc.

HEAPS of luck, i wish thee !!

* remember, once every 10 days you return to baseline, as far as the brain physiology is concerned. (amphet. users, take note)
Title: Re: My body is finally fighting back. - urgent
Post by: Chip on March 07, 2019, 07:50:22 PM
so i got arrested for taking heaps of drugs.and i have been doing that shit for 40 years.

i lost my dignity, they stole my meth pipe which is like stealing all of your syringes.

what's my crime ? get this, right i was;

driving peacefully and carefully down the road
I have been doing it for 40 years and some filthy fuck makes a discriminatory LAW and i become the perpetrater, the bad guy !
i will lose access to my car and pay a heavy fine. I am BROKE and they (Jake, the cunt of a cop) will have BLOOD on their hands.



i used to like the police but now i wish i could kill that filthy stupid cunt.

if i get a charge then i am going to commit suicide by jumping into a moving train.

nobody tried to fix it so i am deeply upset and as usual, i do lots of work and get nothing but facing possible imprisonment is the LAST STRAW. I won'r ever help someone who doesn't deserve it.

The Mind Reading Consortium is a ugly concept because they scan my brain, decode the tiny electrical with AI etc. They are lame and they  hurt me SO much that i want to destroy them like they are doing to me.

Title: Re: My body is finally fighting back. - urgent
Post by: MoeMentim on March 08, 2019, 06:19:28 PM
you got arrested?  possession charge? fuck.
Title: Re: My body is finally fighting back. - urgent
Post by: bignasty on March 08, 2019, 10:55:32 PM
i used to like the police but now i wish i could kill that filthy stupid cunt.

Do you understand why I hate them so much NOW? When I used to say ^ the same type thing, you'd say it's my fault for being an asshole to the cops and if I had just been nice and respectful I wouldn't have gotten in trouble.

Yeah right, I know a guy that just lost his childhood home AND his dad got 16 staples in his head when a tree fell on their house during a storm. So my buddy was getting important stuff outta the house that night and the police came to harass him and he ended up getting arrested for possession of meth. Cops have no empathy or sympathy for anybody. They're dumb fucks who can't think outside the box or empathize with somebody going thru a hard time. Fuck 'em all IMO
Title: Re: My body is finally fighting back. - urgent
Post by: Joseph Hopeless on March 09, 2019, 09:14:15 AM
^^^ Easy Chip, got BigNasty sploogin in his pants now that you see what we usually face in America constantly...But yeah, don't jump in front of a train dude, you'll have A felony, at nearly 60, worst case. Cmon man, you're more than twice my age and I'm on the edge of being a "habitual felon", like he and a lotta others here probably are. Relax, man, take a breath, it's shitty, but be glad you're not where we are(record wise and country wise), guarantee your outcome is gonna be like. A misdemeanor of some kind, some "classes" or some shit, and that'll be it. Relax man, you're good.
Title: Re: My body is finally fighting back. - urgent
Post by: MoeMentim on March 09, 2019, 08:14:58 PM
are they still scanning your brain or have you come down a bit?

fucking pigs though...
Title: Re: My body is finally fighting back. - urgent
Post by: Chip on March 11, 2019, 08:59:31 AM
I deny everything  :-[ 8)
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