Started MMT Today

[Chip]

monk, your rep. and post counts have been restored (standard practice for anybody who wishes to leave, for whatever reason) ... yep, we'll keep the door open for you, just in case.

it's like you never left.

remember, you are only talking about drugs and thus, hopefully finding a way to make your lifestyle choices work better.

dope talk is often one way of coping, it need not be a trigger BUT a big trigger, it most certainly is ... so be honest with yourself if you want it to pay dividends.

welcome back and i hope the MMT works for you - it does for me as my slow taper continues ... 15 mg. today, ORAL !

[Griffin]

I hope you can stick around as well but definitely keep maintaining your sobriety first. Congrats on getting your life in a stable place it isn't easy. I can't imagine having a family to support on top of everything else so you are definitely kicking ass. Hope the new counselor works for you I really like my counselor and I think having a good counselor makes a big difference. My counselor has been doing it 17 years and his brother was an addict who died from complications of HIV/aids. He seems to know a lot and is very down to earth so it he is easy to talk to and very helpful with all aspects of it. Keep us informed how everything is going if you can. We all wish you the best you deserve it keep your head up.



Griffin

[ptbell]

There was a guy starting at my clinic this morning, he looked rough, in bad shape. Anyway MMT is and can be used for pain management its just a question of getting to the right level. A good nurse/doctor and a open line of communication between yourself and councilor and staff w/ go a long way to help that. Try to not focus too much on other peoples dosage amounts, your personal tolerance is not theirs. Good luck the program it is a lifesaver, your lucky you got to the front of the line.

[Chip]

There was a guy starting at my clinic this morning, he looked rough, in bad shape.
<snip>

yes, that reminds me - visiting the clinic is always interesting because it's full of colorful characters and some worse for wear ... it can even resemble a zoo if the queue gets too long.

it can even be a scary place with intimidating types ... all in all, i don't mind my weekly clinic visit, at all.

may your takehomes come quickly and in abundance.

[Opi-ette]

Nice to see that avatar again Monk! I really missed you. Come and go as you see fit, no one is gonna break your "chops" hehe. Wishing you the best with your treatment and new job.

We love you more! 

[Z]

Hugs, but no kisses.

Hey, at least you actually did leave.  Most people just seem to say they are leaving when looking for attention.  Glad to see you around again!

[monkawat]

Hugs, but no kisses.

Hey, at least you actually did leave.  Most people just seem to say they are leaving when looking for attention.  Glad to see you around again!

Thanks man. Hope you're doing well these days.

--------------------------

Quick update- still on the same dose but going up to 50mg as soon as I can next week. Started my new job and the pay structure is so much better than I thought in the beginning of the hiring and training process. I'll hopefully be making around 2.5-3k a month, but my boss thinks a little more than that. Definitely excited.

[Narkotikon]

I'm glad you came back Monkawat. 

It's understandable that you'd be worried about this place causing you to crave.  Like you said though, it is a great place for support, and a great community.  Don't feel bad for changing your mind.  I doubt anyone is going to hold it against you. 

Feel free to lurk and to post as much or as little as you'd like.  Enjoy.      

[monkawat]

Well I am a bit disappointed. I had to quit the door to door sale of home supply shit. It was a big scam. Clasroom training seemed great and i get to the field and it is a bunch of scam artists tricking the poor elderly retirees into losing tens of thousands of dollars to low quality windows and patio doors that arent worth half of their sale value.

I was disgusted at my field trainer, forced him to take me home a bit early,i called the manager and quit. I am turning in my shitty company polo and training info on monday afternoon.

Luckily i have another interview with a family friends little business. It would only be 9 or 10 an hour for 30 hrs a week but its part time $ to just supplement the actual good money (30/hr range) my wife supports us on... still...i feel like a loser right now but i cannot support thieves let alone steal for them.

[ptbell]

You did the right thing. Selling false goods to people isn't worth the bad Karma. Glad your piece of mind was worth more than a few dollars. There is not to much of that going around these days. And like they say, when one door closes, two open. Keep up you self respect and well being, that's what is important in the end.

[Narkotikon]

I'm glad you quit that job.  Selling shitty products to seniors is horrible.  I hope those scammers get caught. 

Hopefully you'll get the new job.  Every little bit helps. 

[monkawat]

I'm glad you quit that job.  Selling shitty products to seniors is horrible.  I hope those scammers get caught. 

Hopefully you'll get the new job.  Every little bit helps.

Thanks man. I appreciate your input always as well as your encouragement. I need all I can get these days, as I am trying to stop getting down on myself too much. Shit can get rough at times when you're constantly doubting yourself and whatnot too.

And thanks ptbell, I don't know ya, but welcome to DAU and thank you for your kind words.

[Tony]

Well I am a bit disappointed. I had to quit the door to door sale of home supply shit. It was a big scam. Clasroom training seemed great and i get to the field and it is a bunch of scam artists tricking the poor elderly retirees into losing tens of thousands of dollars to low quality windows and patio doors that arent worth half of their sale value.

I was disgusted at my field trainer, forced him to take me home a bit early,i called the manager and quit. I am turning in my shitty company polo and training info on monday afternoon.

Luckily i have another interview with a family friends little business. It would only be 9 or 10 an hour for 30 hrs a week but its part time $ to just supplement the actual good money (30/hr range) my wife supports us on... still...i feel like a loser right now but i cannot support thieves let alone steal for them.

Great choice Monkawat! You can always get another job, but if you loose your integrity it can become very hard to regain!

I am proud to call you a friend...

Peace,

Tony

[Narkotikon]

I'm glad you quit that job.  Selling shitty products to seniors is horrible.  I hope those scammers get caught. 

Hopefully you'll get the new job.  Every little bit helps.

Thanks man. I appreciate your input always as well as your encouragement. I need all I can get these days, as I am trying to stop getting down on myself too much. Shit can get rough at times when you're constantly doubting yourself and whatnot too.

And thanks ptbell, I don't know ya, but welcome to DAU and thank you for your kind words.

I know all too well what you mean about shit getting rough at times b/c you're down on yourself.  I've been there too, and it definitely sucks.  Depression, even just situational depression, is a beast. 

I know it's much easier said than done, but try to remember all the positives about yourself and your life.  Those things that you're thankful for.  When you become depressed and get down on yourself, it becomes a self-perpetuating cycle.  The lower you get, the more you believe you're that way, and it spirals out of control. 

Talking about this is a great start.  Even if you don't go the professional route, talking to friends and family is great too.  Use your support network.  And never feel afraid to post about your struggles here, if you feel comfortable doing it.  We're always here to listen and give support. 

Take it easy, and feel better soon Monkawat!  You're too nice of a person to be dealing with this stuff.      

[Griffin]

I know what you mean about not wanting to sell shit door to door. I worked for comcast when I was 21 and they started me out at $65000 a year for doing door to door sales. I swear every other house I went to got screwed and they taught us to not tell people about the install fees, and the fees for each box and channel. I felt horrible about it and I was way to honest to be good at that job I ended up getting fired for not selling enough. I was definitely caught between making 30+ an hour and being able to support my habit which was quickly spinning out of control and my conscious.

I was always upfront about everything and usually only sold internet and told people how to get better deals by calling in and threatening to cancel. I got caught a few times for giving old customers the new deals we were offering only to people who didn't have comcast. They had to honor the deal I made for them but I got quite a few warnings. It is hard to have a flyer offering what a person is paying 250 for 80 bucks and just tell them no sense they already had our service. I could get away with not working and sit at home all day getting high so it was hard for me to find the motivation to go out and scam people. I hope your next interview goes well and it is something you are happy doing. Even if the money isn't the same being happy with your job makes a huge difference. Good luck with everything and I hope it all works out for you.

[St. Theresa]

I have much respect for you monkawat...you did the right thing leaving the scam. And you're in a tough spot, that says a lot.