Pen pals

[Griffin (OP)]

So i wanted to update everyone and get some advice. I got a letter yesterday with a bunch of pictures. The post office cut the bottom about half way across and ripped off the sticker that sealed it and didn't even bother taping it back so the pictures wouldn't fly out. I also have no idea why they are going through my shit. That is beside the point that I am writing this though. I found out she is a chronic pain patient she has rheumatoid arthritis and has had two surgeries on her feet for bone extractions and reconstruction. She only takes hydrocodone and gabapentin but I was wondering if I should tell her I am on methadone?

I definitely want to warn her of the dependency side of it because I am not sure she knows but I think she will need something for her pain for her whole life and she is one year younger than me. She hasn't abused it at all which I don't see how people have such control I mean I guess I kind of do. When I was getting 2 weeks at a time I never dipped in to the next days dose. When I was getting pain meds how ever I would eat them like candy and had zero control. She has a lot of pain and medical problems I am kind of surprised she isn't on something like fentanyl or morphine.

We are most definitely in the friends zone and I am okay with that she moved here from japan when she was 10 which I find very attractive she is gorgeous and very cool with a heart of gold. She is the kind of girl you have meet your parents. She seems perfect but I kinda don't want to be in a relationship cause I suck at them and I need more people like that in my life. I don't want to ruin a good friendship by trying to make it a relationship but I guess if it happens I will just go with the flow and hopefully I have learned from my mistakes with women.

So what would you guys do in this situation? Should I let her know that I used to take oxycodone and oxymorphone and couldn't control myself and then got on methadone and keep the heroin out of the story. Heroin just seems to have such a stigma to it that maybe if I just say I was a pharmer and leave it at that i wont have her running for the hills. I guess I am torn because I want to be honest. I haven't taken anything except methadone sense November 2013 so I kind of have a lid on it. I was able to be completely clean for a little bit when I got out of jail before getting back on MMT.

I keep going back and forth about everything I write to her. I guess cause I like her and don't want to run her off but I think she would be very understanding of everything that I have done and gone through. Any advice would be nice I definitely like keeping people on a need to know basis especially about being on MMT but it would be nice to just be honest and have someone that I can talk to about it sense I haven't told anyone in my family that I am back on it. I can trust her and she wouldn't say anything to anyone if I told her the dirt. She only knows my friends from when we dated for a very short time 5 years ago.


Griffin

[DeadCat]

You could introduce her to the truth gradually. If you ever want there to be something of substance betweeen you it will have to come out eventually anyway.

Perhaps you could start by telling that "It is my understanding that when someone takes opiates......."

To "I've heard about people who...."

To: "I know peole who..."

"Someone close to me has...."

Baby steps. Some people aren't ready to immediately accept something they may well eventually accept and overlook.

[Chip]

disclosure is a good way to build trust and you did manage to control yourself and that's why you got onto Methadone - it's often seen as the responsible thing to do.

if you choose to use a bit here and there, so be it - it's your passion and reward (that's how i see it).

as long as other facets of your life aren't suffering, no need to feel guilty.

... you never know where friendships will take you so as long as you are sincere and wish to slowly release information about yourself, you're doing right by the both of you.

[Chip]

A link ...

https://datingsidekick.com

[Chip]

Discord is another modern way of making "pen pals" type friends.