Author Topic: Anybody ever successfully bribed a LEO?  (Read 831 times)

Offline bignasty (OP)

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Anybody ever successfully bribed a LEO?
« on: August 06, 2018, 09:27:58 PM »
So I've been thinking about this a lot since I got arrested a few days ago. Cops don't make shit and by arresting people, they're really just making $$$ for lawyers, tow companies, judges, probation officers, bail bondsmen, etc... I'd be scared to offer the bribe but I really feel like the outcome would be way better for everybody involved if I said "Look man, you got me dead to rights. I'm going to jail and I'm gonna have to pay a bond to get out, AND my fines are $975 if convicted by themselves. How about you follow me to the ATM and I'll give you $500 cash right now and we'll act like this never happened?"

I'd actually respect cops alot more if they'd go for stuff like ^ this instead of just going by the book and thinking in black and white instead of being able to understand shades of gray/grey.

Have any of you ever pulled off a successful bribe? Or even tried an unsuccessful one? Foreign countries count as they're way more likely to work in Mexico, Columbia, Bahamas, etc...

Also, what's the typical sentence or fine if you're caught trying to bribe a cop?

Offline bonedust

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Re: Anybody ever successfully bribed a LEO?
« Reply #1 on: August 06, 2018, 11:34:47 PM »
They're pricks. I wouldn't even think of it cuz they are just looking to nail you for more stuff. For real. I wish you luck though. But yea, bad idea. Sorry man.
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Offline Joseph Hopeless

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Re: Anybody ever successfully bribed a LEO?
« Reply #2 on: August 07, 2018, 01:01:45 AM »
Man, I wouldn't dare. Not here atleast. Probably would in Mexico or something. But if I was going to, I would NOT say "hey can I bribe you?" You gotta be real vague, say like "man officer, you got me, they're gonna fuck me up..I gotta go by the ATM so I can pay my fees today, you wanna come with me and can I talk to you about what you think I should do about this?" ...Maybe word the last line differently.."Drop" a few hundred in his car, maybe, if he's receptive, I dunno, I've never had the balls to even ask. Please update this whatever you do, I'd really be interested to know what happens, but I would never, unless you are in Mexico or something. I'm in the southern US and that probably would not work here, maybe in a notoriously corrupt place, like Louisiana(I've heard), or Chicago or something. Good luck, regardless.
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Offline bignasty (OP)

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Re: Anybody ever successfully bribed a LEO?
« Reply #3 on: August 07, 2018, 01:52:41 AM »
I don't think I'd ever have the balls to try it either. I'm just saying cops don't make that much and might accept it if they're going thru a hard time financially. If I knew a cop was having money problems, I'd definitely try it as I think I can be pretty persuasive and think I could make a good argument that cops should get paid commission for every arrest since the lawyers and bail bondsmen make money on every arrest.

You'd have to play to their ego and be like "it's not fair that bail bondsmen don't do shit and they're gonna get paid cash money from me when I'd rather just pay the cop that busted me" or something along those lines.

Offline radioactive_man

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Re: Anybody ever successfully bribed a LEO?
« Reply #4 on: August 07, 2018, 02:35:45 PM »
I'd probably try to do something like this. :D


Offline nick

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Re: Anybody ever successfully bribed a LEO?
« Reply #5 on: August 07, 2018, 10:23:43 PM »
When in a hole it's best to stop fucking digging,man.

Offline Specter

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Re: Anybody ever successfully bribed a LEO?
« Reply #6 on: August 18, 2018, 03:53:31 AM »
I have successfully done it one time however it was someone I was familiar with from high school and was more than 99% sure he was still a scumbag.  I also carried quite a bit of cash on me in those days as I had a good job in sales and I played a lot of poker back then.  I gave him $400 and he drove me back home for what would have been at least a DUI I was also ripped on my own script at the time as well and had those in my bookbag in the back seat.  He let my girl drive the car home too.  Saved me a lot of BS.

However I’m not sure it’s ever worth the rod if you aren’t VERY VERY certain they’d go along with it.

Offline bignasty (OP)

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Re: Anybody ever successfully bribed a LEO?
« Reply #7 on: August 18, 2018, 04:11:01 AM »
Bet that was the best $400 you ever spent. It probably saved you another $1000 or more, not to mention all the hassle of court, lawyer, possible probation, fines, community service, DUI classes, victim impact class, etc...

Offline Specter

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Re: Anybody ever successfully bribed a LEO?
« Reply #8 on: August 18, 2018, 07:31:07 AM »
Oh for sure... I was halfass friends, more like acquaintances with the guy in high school and I knew from around the casinos that he had a gambling problem.  I only played poker but I had won two poker tournaments in a 6 month span that totaled a little over $300K in winnings and I gave a lot of that back playing in the pit and doing massive amounts of narcotics.  So I was positive that cash would get him back in action... I tried $200 first and he scoffed at me.  I vaguely remember him asking for $400 and he’d drive me home and I couldn’t get the money out of my pocket fast enough.  Fucker tried to blackmail me about a month later for more money but I’m not sure he thought it through totally because I remember my girl was like “does he not remember he took a bribe????”  Smart woman.

Offline Chip

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Re: Anybody ever successfully bribed a LEO?
« Reply #9 on: August 18, 2018, 10:10:04 AM »
i found $1000's of Monopoly dollars and stuffed them in my console for a laugh.

i eventually got stopped for a Random Breath Test and said that i was totally smashed and would he be happy for a 10 grand bribe to make it go away ?

some cops have no sense of humour.

Post Merge: August 18, 2018, 10:22:46 AM
Oh for sure... I was halfass friends, more like acquaintances with the guy in high school and I knew from around the casinos that he had a gambling problem.  I only played poker but I had won two poker tournaments in a 6 month span that totaled a little over $300K in winnings and I gave a lot of that back playing in the pit and doing massive amounts of narcotics.  So I was positive that cash would get him back in action... I tried $200 first and he scoffed at me.  I vaguely remember him asking for $400 and he’d drive me home and I couldn’t get the money out of my pocket fast enough.  Fucker tried to blackmail me about a month later for more money but I’m not sure he thought it through totally because I remember my girl was like “does he not remember he took a bribe????”  Smart woman.

VERY smart woman. bribe's in first world countries are akin to a pact with the devil.

In 3rd world countries it helps to pay the underpaid and under-resourced officer's wages and helps feed their families.

your best penalty mitigation tools are passivity, respect, sincerity and honesty (where applicable !) when dealing with the authorities.

surely that's the best way to go.

we know some laws are too harsh and unfair; they have a one-size-fits-all model (eg. sobriety testing that doesn't factor in tolerance) and that's often just not realistic.

i have had favorable results from the courts and have faith in my justice system (so far).
« Last Edit: August 18, 2018, 10:22:46 AM by Chip »
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Offline Specter

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Re: Anybody ever successfully bribed a LEO?
« Reply #10 on: August 18, 2018, 08:18:59 PM »
I agree... I’ve found the nicer you are the easier life is with LEOs.  However I’ve been lucky in that aspect because I have no record— no felonies or misdemeanors at all and have been told I don’t look like an addict so I don’t get shit on by them.  With that said... you’re never too far away from those realities when you mess with H.

You’re so right though about those guys taking bribes— they’re basically at risk of firing and public humiliation if it ever comes out.  But he was an addict too— just with gambling instead of a substance.

Offline Chip

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Re: Anybody ever successfully bribed a LEO?
« Reply #11 on: August 19, 2018, 07:31:18 AM »
gambling is the worst addiction.

it's invisible, 100% psychological and hits you where you live.

i'm a gaming machine user myself; if you get a big win early in your session then it's extremely difficult to just get up and leave.
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Offline Specter

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Re: Anybody ever successfully bribed a LEO?
« Reply #12 on: August 19, 2018, 07:42:46 AM »
Yea I have a gambling problem as well.... luckily every time I’ve gone deep in a poker tournament I’ve gotten 1st if 2nd but at that stage it’s a lot of luck.

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Re: Anybody ever successfully bribed a LEO?
« Reply #13 on: August 19, 2018, 10:46:43 PM »
i lived in vegas 25 years & gambled one roll of quarters when i turned 21, that's it. i always thought of it as giving away my drug money.

Offline Specter

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Re: Anybody ever successfully bribed a LEO?
« Reply #14 on: August 19, 2018, 11:02:25 PM »
Yea I’ve never had to choose gambling or drugs... I already know I’d choose drugs if that were the case.

The best gamblers in the poker world have a very small % of themselves and charge markup for their talent so it’s not like risking large sums of money.


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